Showing posts with label Lifestyle. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lifestyle. Show all posts
Bon apres midi, y'all. It is 5 days past New Years and while you were all running around improving your lives and what not with resolutions, I was doing absolutely nothing of the sort until about 5 minutes ago.

What follows is therefore not a set of resolutions, but goals which I will achieve without necessarily setting a timeline to them. #Flawless
(NB: If this is the definition of a resolution, send me a notarized letter stating this so I can take this post down & come to your house to show you personally. Thank you.)

Resolutions

These are being listed here specifically to keep myself accountable for actually completing them. 'cause nobody ever lies on the internet. Let's get to it, then, shall we?

1. Actually finish my HTML5/CSS courses

My intermittent attempts to learn coding have generally been subject to inspiration from hacker movies and wandering on to the Skillcrush blog page, which is amazing. Scheduling my Codecademy modules has so far not been super successful either, but, BUT this year, I'm going to do one hour a week. This way, I'll be done by the time I'm 70 and I can ask our Lizard Overlords for permission to go online and update this post to read "Done".


2. Pick up on my contributing authoring

This one can actually be summed up as "Stop being a trash person".

3. Do a creative writing thingie

I'm not 100% clear on how to achieve this but basically, post my random writing online, platform to be decided. Maybe Wattpad?
Presently, all my writing stuff is concentrated on Jotterpad, the phone app. Fun fact- this is where I wrote my alternate ending/shameless fanfiction of Z. Rider's "Suckers".
What has two thumbs, a questionable sleep schedule and has had an incredible author read their fanfiction?

Liz Lemon This Moi
This moi! williesun

Have I talked about how super nice Z.Rider is on Twitter and email already? (Yes I have). In case I haven't (Yes, I have), allow me to do so now. Go follow her here and read her amazing books. Thaaaank youuu.

4. Actually wear my retainers

I'm writing this on the off chance that my orthodontist does really specific google searches for niche nonsense blogs. Hi, Doc!

5. Pick up on my graphic design stuff

I love how that sounded like I actually have a graphic design background or signed up for a class. None of that is true, FOR NOW.
A person with such a startlingly short attention span needs multiple creative outlets, you guys.
We can do this. We can crush it.


6. Stop neglecting my Coursera account

This is a twofer, filed under "Being a trash person" and "needing to keep my flighty mind occupied".
I find when I have nothing to stress about/challenge me, my mind goes to terrifying directions and I tend to fixate on things that push me back a few steps in my quest to become the ultimate tentacled hipster monster. Unfortunate. I intend, therefore, to direct my obsessive focus on more positive things this year.

Nicole Richie Positive Person gif
Indeed. giphy

7. Stay Inspired

Read, watch, listen to or otherwise telepathically beam great things directly into my brain. You know the books you read that leave you awed and kind of upset that you weren't the one to write them?
Those do a great job of getting me all fired up to write for at least a good week afterwards. Memoirs like Felicia Day's or Sophia Amoruso's, books geared towards giving you a deeper understanding of the world and yourself (hi, Johann Hari and Marshall Goldsmith), I'm about them all. Allllll.
Same goes for your basic motivational videos on YouTube, incredible TED talks like this one by Dame Stephanie Shirley and of course, booktubers out here killing it.
Basically, my goal is to do something once a week to keep my batteries charge and never succumb to boredom or apathy. *national anthem plays in the background*

Alright then. This was the last such random post that had nothing to do with nothing. Regularly scheduled programming shall resume on Friday with *excited gasp* a Weekly Shawarma!
For the opposite of resolutions and actually getting things done like a grown-ass, grown ass person, 'tis I, Lunar Queen Evey. Mwah!
The title, much like the concept of rational thought, has nothing to do with this post. Buenos noches, my spambots and Eastern European otakus, you have all been missed.

#Goals

The first post of 2016 is pretty much a "Hello from the other side" kind of thing (#BadumTss #TimelyReference) without much meat or substance. I am simply here to share the fact that we are back, promise posts you will never actually see and start a support group for those of us eagerly waiting on the next season of Tokyo Ghoul.


You guys. We need hugs.
For nonsense, taller nonsense and nonsense in Russian, 'tis I, Evey G. Happy 2016!



Three guesses who's been taking down her braids since yesterday and keeps finding justifications to give herself commercial breaks? That's right, Queen Elizabeth. Also, me. 
It has just occurred to me that in spite of being Team Natural from birth (never relaxed my hair), having an intermittent interest in learning to manage my black hair better and firmly believing some of these natural videos are just straight up witchcraft, I have yet to make any mention of it on this here corner of the interwebs. Therefore, here we go: Natural Hair Tingz.

Natural Hair products
Yissssssss. Leave in conditioner, henna treatment/dye & heat protector.

Naturally, (hehehe) a lot can be said about 20some years of hair stuff, so to make sure I don't overwhelm y'all, I'll break it down into smaller installments that will stay in my drafts folder until Vladimir Putin's raw sexiness goes nuclear and kills us all and post over time, probably split into the following categories: 

The Basics
As I said, I've been Team Natural from birth. My wet hair reverts to spring coils that can be classified as 4B/4C depending on the alignment of the moon and Mars. It's also very light or "thin" which means it's fairly easy to straighten into a look that can pass for texturized, but also prone to frizzing in a way that can only be considered supernatural. I legit cannot even look at pink lotion without erupting into an afro, it's crazy. Basically, my hair is made entirely of middle fingers to me & my sanity.

Like this, but curly. weknowmemes

Sidebar: in highschool, I got strands of hair from a friend with thick hair (no further questions on how) and strands of my own under a microscope in the bio lab and my strands were actually way thinner than the average. Apparently, this is a thing? Granted, my ancestry is...complicated *waves to cousin with random blue eyes while being very black* so maybe that's it? 

Current Status
Technically, my hair texture should be easy to manage in it's curly glory, but being long, it's very prone to tangling while I attempt those fabulous natural hair styles I covet online. Mostly, I'm just faaaaaar too lazy to do all that flat twist business as often as is needed- I'll be accepting your "Positive Female Rolemodel" trophies via DHL, thank you.


I survive on washing, treating, then blowdry & flat ironing it at the salon, which I try to limit to once a month. I'm sure the people that do my hair are grateful for this since I'm an absolute nightmare as far as "Owwww, easy on the edges/No, blowdry in one direction/The heat on this is too high" demands are concerned.

Natural Hair Products
Once upon a time, I thought I was G and got light brown henna on my very very black hair. Needless to say, I looked like that old pair of black jeans we all wash too often if said jeans also got very drunk and fell in bleach: d.i.s.a.s.t.r.o.u.s. I dyed it back to black with a great henna hair colour/treatment (Inecto) & liked the defined black better than my natural hair colour, have been doing so about every 3 months ever since.
Day to day use, I'm big on coconut oil 'cause it's the only thing that works with my finnicky scalp AND hair the consistency of cat fur (Hi Mum).

My yearbook photo. I've...uh...lost some weight. cattime

I worked with Amla for a while which aside form being awesome for your hair, also smells like zombie diapers. 
If you take nothing else from this meandering ramble, go with this: TRESEMME SMOOTH SALON SILK SERUM IS THE HAIR MESSIAH.  Details to follow in the product review post that you will probably have to come to house to retrieve. I'll leave out cookies. 

Problems
Edges. Once upon a time, a lady convinced me to try Afro kinky pencil braids which looked amazing but would come to cost me my soul and about an inch off my hairline. I'm still recovering, almost 4 years later and my very bitchy hairdresser insists some of the hair loss is permanent (Hi Jeff), though I can't be sure if he's just being a terrible person. 
Furthermore, my scalp. Flaking doesn't begin to cover it, though oddly enough, it's only at the front of my head in some cruel twist of fate. Back when health insurance was a thing, I went to a dermatologist about it, who helped with exactly jack squat. So far, coconut oil (blessed be) does A LOT for the dryness, but I also just got an Oriflame product that better help or I'm suing everybody, you included.
These issues don't phase me, though: I know I'm our hair deity, the Goddess of Flawlessness is watching over me.

While waving at the peasants. femmehub

As far as introductory preview posts, I'd say this one was a winner, non? The eventual continuation will eventually be announced and posted eventually. *moonwalks out*

Fashion fans and fanatics, it's time: we need to stop wearing clothes. 

As you should have heard by now from the frantic nonstop frothing of your otaku friends about the coming live action movie, Shingeki no Kyojin (also known as 'Attack on Titan' manga series & anime) is THE hottest commodity the world of anime/manga has gifted the world since the beginning of time.


Aside from an exquisite storyline, unforgettable characters and mind-melting visuals, Attack on Titan has also given us one more invaluable gift: fashion and style tips for the ages. 
Yes, you can indeed expect the fashion industry to stand up and pay attention to this stunning stylings of Eren, Mikasa, Armin, and of course, LEVI! 

Yes. rebloggy

Fashion bloggers and style fans take note: this is how YOU can be the best dressed gal or guy in the room with Shingeki no Kyojin (SNK):

1. Sometimes, No Clothes are the best clothes
The world has continued to lean towards the “going natural” trends and the fashion world agrees! One great way to embrace the natural you is simply to ditch the latest clothing fads and show off your amazing skin by going au naturale: wear no clothes at all!
An important point to remember when embracing this trend is that modesty is key. Remember to trim unnecessary body parts such as all external genitalia to avoid a nasty fashion faux pas that's a major no-no!


Better yet, why not step it up a notch by ditching both clothes AND skin altogether? The message repeated by fashion mavens through the ages has remained the same: embrace the natural you! What's more attractive to a potential suitor than a confident display of how developed and functional your tendons are? If you're single, you're guaranteed not to be for much longer!***Note 1

The perfect ensemble for prom. (obvious screenshot)

2. Have a Personal Coat of Arms
The residents of Shingeki no Kyojin are divided into 3 walls, each with their own distinct and identifying symbol; a great fashion lesson in personal branding. What can be more one of a kind than a symbol that's all yours? A good place to start would be with a butterfly, heart, flock of birds or a dolphin as your foundation, then build on that to make your sidgil truly one of a kind. This is best displayed on your lower back or, should you go for a more tribal chic or barbed wire-inspired design, on your bicep, where it can be shown off by your collection of muscle t-shirts.

Ours is the fury! butterfatstudios

3. When choosing accessories go for stylish AND functional
In the olden days, when fashion was just a fledgling concept, the trend setters of the day knew how to make every item of clothing count. Earrings that could be used as spear tips, bracelets with jangling beads that could serve as toys for children, loincloths that could double as...morning after loincloths: everything had a purpose beyond aesthetics.

For your next date. curellasays

Take this to the next leve with Shingeki no Kyojin inspired 3D maneuver gear. Customizable in different colours such as steel, chrome, or metallic grey to match your styling needs, this funky accessory serves both as an elegant mode of transportation and a statement piece to really make your outfit stand out.

Like Spiderman, but AWESOME. rebloggy

Functional 3D maneuver gear not yet available in your country? Build your own DIY project from reinforced titanium, intricate pully sytems and lengths of barbed wire. Test out your creation by jumping off the roof adjacent to the next social event or fashion gathering you wish to attend to make a splash!***Note 2

4. Pop of Colour
Add a daredevil hint of excitement to your formal gown with the effortlessly stylish Survey Corps hooded cape. Protect your hair from the elements, hide your face from papparazi or ex boyfriends and look chic, all at once with this forest green fashion must have, made that much more unique and fashion forward by the wings of freedom emblazoned across the back.

Seen here on Mariah Carey in 1995. ebay

5. Incorporate Living Elements to Really Make Your Outfit stand out
Bond villains have their white cats, our dark lord Mugatu has his poodle, and you, dear fashion forward reader, what do you have? A horse.

Oh, hello there. chickensmoothie

Understandably, keeping a horse requires a little bit more effort than the average Paris Hilton purse dog, but it is beyond worth it. Aside from a fashion statement no one will forget, you also get a convenient source of instant hair extensions, which, so hot right now.

Hansel is the name of my horse. imgfave

Show up at a party wearing the same outfit as someone else? Your problem can easily be solved in a dignified ladylike way by getting your horse to take a steaming, fashionable dump on the offender to prompt a change of clothes. Horses can also be dyed to match your outfit of the day, with a wide range of organic paints that are great on your skin and gentle on Mother Earth.

Which is not crazy and unnecessary at all.  adorableanimals4lois

There you have it, dolls! Not only is Shingeki no Kyojin among the best manga/anime series known to man, it is also a deep well of fashion inspiration. Go ye forth and put your best foot forward with these stylish tips and we guarantee you'll be the talk of the town. Remember to share your pictures with us on Instagram and Twitter, with the hashtag #WeAreNotLegallyLiableForThis.
Have a fashionable week, ladies and gents!

***Note 1: because you'll be dead from massive infection. But still not single!
***Note 2: A red splash, because your design may not work as advertised, and you will super die. A stylish red splash though.

What's better than being up at 04:00am because you have plans at 09:00am and you know if you sleep you'll be out cold 'til late afternoon? Everything. Everything is better than this torment. Your resident insomniac has returned with a piping hot serving of shawarma for this week (left overs in the fridge can be found here) for this week. My theme today, typed while listening to "Just a Kiss" by lady Antebellum, is guilty pleasures. Obviously. Let's get to it, shall we.

1. Reading

I make no secret of my love for Russell Brand and the fauna that inhabits his beard: he's wildly hilarious with that brand of intelligence catches you off guard. Seeking this wit in written form, my reading for this week is his "My Booky Wook 2". I've heard it's not as fabulous as its predecessor (which I'm still looking for), *shrugs* let's see.



2. Fashun


As much as I feel that pic alone is sufficient fashun to last the rest of the year, I must press on. As far as sartorial mentors go, there are few better than Mr Bass himself as far as dressing like a dapper gent goes. Thankfully, the Internet gods are feminists and have blessed us with acres of guides on translating Bassian looks for those of us with bewbs.


There you have it. If you happen to spot a girl in a bow tie and unruly hair on the bus this week, please look away, I have terrible social anxiety. Speaking of looks you should look away from:

Red. Onesie. Hoodie. Style Bistro
Never forget.

3. Watching

On to Guilty Pleasure lane. Remember when that telenovella 'Maria De Los Angeles' was all the rage and everyone had a crush on that herbalist bro with a red headband or Radames Basanta? Yes, me neither, as it never happened. *clears throat*
Similarly not happening is my enthusiastically watching the soap of our times, 'Revenge'.


Veering from "omg what happens next" to bat caca nonsense with insane glee guaranteed to give you whiplash, I am ashamed to say that I have religiously consumed 3 seasons of 2014's answer to 'The Bold and The Beautiful'. My name is Evey and only your specific god can judge me.

Honourable Mention

I tweeted this gem on Tuesday, and I'm compelled to direct your attention here today. A little backstory: social media is being used to find delinquent fathers that skip out on child support in the States. Some of the ones who are caught are interviewed by Fox to find out their reason for being a special flavour of awful person. One such interview, which totally changed my life, is below.
Awesomely Luvvie, where the vine is from, does this story true justice HERE: the story plus comments are everything. EVERYTHING.

'til next week folks, no further questions. *is carried away by giant owl*





Mood Music. 

As explained last week, the lazily tentatively titled Weekly Shawarma series  is a round up type situation of what has been read, listened to or otherwise enjoyed during the week. Without further pomp and circumstance, let's get right into it.


1. Reading

Contemporary Reads: I got into "One More Thing: Stories and Other Stories" by BJ Novak, otherwise known as Ryan from the Office and that guy that's maybe dating Mindy Kaling. I'm in the process of writing a review which will likely be up by end of the week, Safaricom internet & other writing engagements allowing.


Classic Read: Since Hipster Overdose is a real thing that has claimed several lives, I decided to break that up with Asimov's "Youth", which is a surprisingly easy read. I'm not sure why I expected it to be borderline clunky like Lovecraft, but I'm pleasantly surprised and looking forward to completing it. 

Throwback read: Did you guys catch Kevin Mwachiro's "Invisible" book release waaaaaay way back? I've been turning over my feelings on said book for a while now, since I actually finished reading it the same day it was officially launched. I dunno. The jury's out on whether I'll review it.

2. Fashun

If I had unlimited financial resources and no family to be ashamed of me, my wardrobe would be described as "Time-traveler from the 20s on speed". Or "Ugh, another hipster", depending on how much sugar was in your cereal in the morning. To this end, one of my favourite places on the internet is the ModCloth Instagram page 'cause gurrrrrrrl. 

For this and other reasons that require medication, when I found Pin Up Girl Clothing I was ecstatic. It's like a candy shop for my retro hypoglycemia.


Do they deliver to Kenya? Yes. Are the delivery charges about half the cost of the product itself (or more than the actual price if you want priority shipping)? Also, yes. So, y'know, boo and such. Silver lining: they have a dedicated gallery for stuff like this so at the very least you can find inspiration for looks and stuff then Toi/Gikosh your way to an outfit. So, glass half full. 


3. Listening to


I haz been rocking to Jason Derulo's "Tattoos" album all week, and dude is doing it. "Stupid in Love" and "The Other Side" are my staples here but I'm ok with "Trumpets" as well. Getchu a piece on my playlist below. Sidebar: the tattoos on the album cover over there are actually titles of the tracks on the album, as pointed out by popcrush. Yeiz.

Also, guys. Guise. Guyz. Sam Tsui. Shhhh. Just listen.


As promised, playlist here. For some reason, I can't change the SoundCloud settings to let playlists embed, but I am working on it and shall have one up directly on the blog soon. A direct player, if possible. By all means get your hopes way, WAY up. 

Honourable Mention


Bad decisions took corporeal form and possessed the internet this week as Blue Steel poster-child Jeremy Meeks' mugshot sent a great (ambitious) many of you spinning into "my love can fix him" mode. #FelonCrushFriday

Among other things. via Audrey Brooks/Facebook

Years later when scientists gather to study how astronomical levels of THURST scorched all that remained of the Ozone layer, you will smile a secret smile and know you did your part to help doom the human race. Congratulations. Backstory here.


Aite, that's it for this week. In a lot of ways, the shawarma posts are a way to share finds and keep the page updated. Obviously, the kinks are still worked out and *insert speech about fine wine aging here*. 'til next time. (rides into horizon on Hell Hound)

Bon apres midi mes amis! Full disclosure: I had no intention of doing a post today, BUT an impromptu shopping trip on Saturday has me all riled up to be stylish. ...well, to write about being stylish anyway *adjusts jeans and T-shirt*.

Now, I have made several proclamations about putting together outfits on this blog, and I AM still in the process of acquiring the pieces necessary to construct them, so allow me to add this to my pile:


Ladies and Gents, introducing my spirit animal, Monkey D Luffy. Yes, you knew this was going to go the anime way, but hear me out. Seriously, guys? Seriously? Luffy is FABULOUS.

Just got real. via lionheart24movieanime

This is Luffy in Gear Second, also known as "Bend Over and Kiss your Bum Goodbye because it is OVAH" mode. Now, I won't even front, One Piece is so beautifully written that certain bloggers may end up in tears at some of the story or character arcs. Not me, of course, other bloggers. Others.

What makes my day is how the character outfits correlate so completely believably to their personalities. Take our dear friend Luffy. Luffy is probably the single most happy go lucky individual ever to grace your screen, which is clearly visible in his style choices, or lack of them. 




Standard Luffy uniform is generally sandals (totes relate), jeans shorts, his red vest and of course, THE HAT. Mad simple right? For further purposes of style inspiration, and in kicking off the #WhatWouldLuffyWear movement, I have cataloged my favourite Luffy style moments below:


7. Afro Luffy

Because everyone knows Afros give you super powers. Try it and thank me later.


6. After Timeskip Luffy

The importance of accessorizing cannot be overlooked, even when kicking serious butt.
5. Girl Luffy
via cosplaycostumes.co

Technically not a Luffy outfit but how cute is that for December at the Coast! Or a sunny summer day to go feed bacon to bald eagles in the park? Insert your cultural reference for sunny frolicking here.

4. Sun-smart Luffy


Sun damage is real people! Use that sunscreen!

3. Practical Luffy



Here Luffy dons chic black cargo shorts, proving once and for all that they will never go out of style. His reason? He needed the pockets to carry more meat. For real. *sheds single tear* Teach me, Master.

 2. Freeze and Shine Luffy

via  comicvine submitted by flashdamn

Ladies, take note. As long as you're wearing a jacket in the frozen Kenyan winter of July, it is perfectly acceptable to wear shorts/short skirts. Hypothermia? Made up by doctors who are jealous of your swag.

1. Sir Luffy

ridiculously amazing image by xxraccaxxdavidxx on deviantart

This. Just....this. This ensemble is my everything. If you've watched the One Piece movie Strong World, you too were instantly struck blind by the waves of Awesome wafting out of your screen when the Mugiwara Pirates stepped onto the scene to stare down Shiki. I mean, good God, man, Luffy is in a TIE!
With this image comes the only style lesson you will ever need: if you can make sandals and a straw hat work with otherwise formal attire and a GUN? You can wear anything and look fabulous.
There. We can close fashion now, it's over.

Wishing you nothing but fabulousity and good cheer, au revoir.

 I know you can hear the laugh in your head. sophiebridgers

I'm 93% sure that there is no need for me to have a lengthy introduction to the phenomenon that is the TV series The Vampire Diaries,  which is good, since I had no plans of trying to explain anything that happens on there.

this was a thing that happened with magic swords. Price Peterson

While there are a number of characters on the show that I ADORE and want to have little vampwolf puppy-babies with, this is not about them.

regardless of how gorgeous the babies would be. imgfave

 No, friends, this will be about one of the most underrated characters on the show, the witch Bonnie Bennet.

I'm fabulous. nowhitenoise

Specifically, the incredible actress who plays Bonnie (who's terrible apart from season 4, you go girl), Miss Kat Graham.


If you clicked on the link above, you should already see some of why I think Kat is amazing: apart from speaking Spanish, Hebrew, French and Portuguese, *jaw drops* Ms Graham has also been in the biz for quite a while, starting out in commercials aged 6. What were you doing when you were 6?

 
Admirable child star trajectory aside, reading through Kat's body of work makes one thing abundantly clear: regardless of what else she was involved in between 1995 and now, the one that's stayed the same is her drive to pursue a musical career. With random gigs tangentially related to the music industry as well as acting roles to help drive up her exposure and find industry connections, Kat has stayed true to her course and has finally made it.


Finally signing a recording contract with major label A&M Octone Records in 2012, Kat dropped her (first official?) single, Put Your Graffiti On Me, which you can listen to on Grooveshark at that link. On a related note, don't you just get so worked up when you're trying to find a song on Soundcloud and EVERY search result is a cover or remix??


My point here is that Kat persevered, writing music, background dancing and fabulously defying the laws of fashion until her dream worked out, fabulously.

Still fabulous. katgraham

The video for her epic track "Wanna Say" can be found on YouTube and is definitely worth checking out, if not for the super catchy beats, then for the fierce fashion moments that will CHANGE. YOUR. LIFE. Observe:

Lace eyebrows = Every Girl's Best Friend. ryanseacrest

Or this:

 eyelid rhinestones are Spring must-haves. pausaparafeminices

 Or this reminder that exercising can be sexy when you combine squats and a bright red lip:

 Gloves optional. toyazworld


Sheer Awesomenes in volumes that mere mortals can barely comprehend, which is to be expected by default from the lady that gave us this ensemble:

More fabulous than you. haryanaabtak


There you have it: Ms (soon to be Mrs by the by) Katerina Alexandre Graham has taught us all how to get it: go after what you want, even if you have to do a few things in the meantime that have no relation to your passion, every experience is a lesson. Fashion inspiration and pursuer of success, we salute you.


F.a.b.u.l.o.u.s   glee